


Do you know what it feels like to fall in love?( Neither do i)

by McCorsdog



Category: Twilight Series - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, Emotional Hurt, Everyone is Bisexual, Everything is Beautiful and Everything Hurts, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Heartbreak, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Multi, My First Work in This Fandom, Slow Burn, Slow To Update, bad at feelings, bella is honest, lets see how this goes, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-21
Updated: 2020-05-27
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:14:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24298681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/McCorsdog/pseuds/McCorsdog
Summary: Bella had said that she wanted to meet him, to talk about their relationship and Jacob was really hoping that she was picking him, but he knew better, he also knew whatever she was going to say he wasn't going to like it. She was taking forever and it was making Jacob nervous so nervous that he started pacing. When he finally heard the footsteps that he was waiting to hear, he turned to meet her with a smile. She smiled back but it wasn't a normal smile it was the nervous smile.“ Jake i hate to be the one to tell you this but i choose Edward, and I want us to still be bestfriends, please don’t hate me “
Relationships: Bella Swan/Original Female Character, Edward Cullen/Bella Swan, Jacob Black/Bella Swan, Jacob Black/Edward Cullen, Jacob Black/Edward Cullen/Bella Swan, Jacob Black/Original Female Character
Kudos: 15





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> so this is for a friend , i based the oc off of her i hope you guys like it. i am going to try to stay on top off updating. but sometimes my brains goes faster than my brain can type lol . oh they're all in highschool together .

Bella had said that she wanted to meet him, to talk about their relationship and Jacob was really hoping that she was picking him, but he knew better, he also knew whatever she was going to say he wasn't going to like it. She was taking forever and it was making Jacob nervous so nervous that he started pacing. When he finally heard the footsteps that he was waiting to hear, he turned to meet her with a smile. She smiled back but it wasn't a normal smile it was the nervous smile. 

“ Jake i hate to be the one to tell you this but i choose Edward, and I want us to still be bestfriends, please don’t hate me “ 

That's when his entire world felt like it was crashing down around and coming down into a single second, he couldn't believe it was happening just like he thought it was, but he didn't think it would happen so soon. He thought he would have a chance to prove to Bella that he is the one for her, that he can treat her better than Edward. Bella took a step towards him, he took a couple of steps back just to put distance between them. Jacob couldn't be near her right now, he didn't want to be near her. It hurt too much, his heart was breaking.

“ Jake, I am sorry, I know it hurts, “ Bella said with so much emotion that he couldn't look at her, it honestly made Bella sad. 

Jacob turned his head to look at the girl he loves, so much emotion that Bella had no choice but to stare into his eyes, Bella backed up and held her down. The silence was killing her, she didn't want Jacob to keep loving her when she couldn't love him in return, not the way he would want her too, she was doing this for his well being, she didn't want to hurt him anymore. Her attention was drawn back to him he spoke.

“Bella you know i don't understand why you would choose him over me, but the heart wants what it wants and if your heart wants the leech then so be it, I'll get over it. I am not under your beck and call anymore Bella, I am going to need space, keep your distance, i need to heal and being around you isn't going to help.”

“ There's nothing to understand Jake, i love him Jake, i want to be with him.”

“ Yeah well apparently I wasn't good enough for you.” 

“JAKE!” Bella screamed. “ it was never like that, I am just following my heart and I don't want to lead you on anymore than I have Jacob, please believe me.” 

Jacob shook his head, trying to stop the tears from coming down his face, he deserves better than this. 

Bella went to touch Jacobs face but he grabbed her hand before it could touch his face, it even hurt to touch her. He threw her away from him. Looking her in the eyes is the last thing he wants to do, but he does it anyway .

“ Bella you have hurt me more than anyone else in my life, I don't think I can be around you ,I don't hate you but I can't be around you and him anymore, you choose what you want and know I have to do what's best for me. What I need to do, to put myself back together, we're still friends but it's going to take us some time to get back to where we were” 

By the time he was done Bella had tears in her eyes and Jacob would have felt bad if he wasn't on the verge of crying himself and couldn't take it anymore . all the love he felt for her now was pain that he couldn't handle, he's going to see her at school, both of them and he doesn't think he can handle that by any means. He knew it was going to come down to this, her wanting to be with the sparkling vampire, that could give her anything she ever wanted. He couldn't do all he could do was offer up all of his love and attention , was it not enough? Jacob looked at her again and couldn't even stand to look at her, so he transformed into his wolf and ran off to the woods leaving her there waiting for her damn leech.

“ I never meant to hurt you” Bella said as a soft whisper, knowing that Jacob heard her anyway.

Bella watched Jacob leave her, she had hurt him so badly that he couldn't even stand to be around her, and that hurts more than anything. She wants nothing more to give him a hug but she knows that would only hurt him more than comfort him. She turns back around to look up to see Edward standing there with a concerned look on his face. She hugs him and he wraps her arms around him and tells him what she said to Jacob, she feels like she just lost her best friend. Edward wipes her tears away and tells her everything is going to be ok, and for some reason she believes him.

Bella can wait, she'll wait for Jacob to forgive her, to forgive them, she'll give him all the time in the world. Hopefully she won't need to though. She had to tell him the truth, she couldn't lead Jacob on anymore, he deserves better than her. One day he'll see it through her eyes. 

Jacob could hear all of the pack trying to comfort him ,saying that he didn't need her, and she doesn't know what she's missing out on, and how they’re going to be there for him every step of the way, but it wasn't working. Jacob was hurt, confused and feeling used. He felt as though that he does need Bella, he needs like a fish needs water. He guesses that he’s going to have to learn how to live without her. 

Jacob got home, he went straight to his room and laid down. He cried , everything is just so painful, it's too much. Jacob now knows what it feels like to feel heartbreak for the first time. He just keeps telling himself that it's going to take time but he’s going to make it and he’s going to be ok with her or without her, it sounds like he’s lying to himself.

He was the rest of the weekend to be by himself and get himself together.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> soooo i am trying to keep up with updates, cause this is for my friend but sometimes my brain think faster than i can type lol 
> 
> anyways i read a lot of webtoons too lol so i be getting too caught up in my reading instead of writing 
> 
> how are you guys doing

Bella hasn't heard from Jacob all weekend and the rest of the pack is ignoring her calls , the only one answering them is Billy, bless his soul. She knew she really hurt Jake but she just wants to know that he’s okay and not hurting himself . today she finally gets to see him, with her own eyes to make sure he’s ok herself. 

Edward is watching Bella very colesy to make sure she doesn't get too close to the hurting wolf, he heard that wolves dealing with heartbreak really dont take it well. He doesn't want Jacob to hurt her in any kind of way. Bella thinks that he’s over thinking everything and maybe she’s right but he’s not taking any chances.

When they finally saw Jacob, he looked well and rested for someone taking heartbreak badly. He was dressed in a black hoodie and black pants, and his book bag looked very snuggly on his back. 

“Jake!!” Bella screamed and waved at him.

Jacob looked up and looked Bella then looked at Edward and frowned. Just the people he didn't want to see right now, he needs space, he didn't even want to look at them right now. judging by the look on Edward's face he read Jacob's thoughts. Jacob couldn't find it in him to feel guilty about his feelings, so he did the only thing he could think off and kept walking into the school. He didn't want to converse with them, bella isn't his problem anymore. 

Edward felt bad, but happy to know that the wolf was out of the way, he can have Bella all to himself and he doesn't have to share his time with his beloved, it makes him happy. He’s also sad because he knows this is causing bella pain and it’s only been a couple of days since she talked to jacob and jacob just started avoiding her. He understands why he’s avoiding them, he’s hurt and needs time, everything isn't going to get better overnight. Maybe he can try to talk to Jacob to try to make things a little bit better. 

Bella should have known that Jacob wasn’t ready to talk to her but she had wanted to try to see if he was going to speak to her. It didn’t work. He looked at her frown and walked into the school building. Bella would be lying if she said she wasn’t hurt about that, but she knew she was pushing it too far . He was still hurting and she knew that being around her must be painful for him. She doesn't cause Jacob anymore pain, she wants him to be happy and if that means without her.

Bella sighed and looked at edward, edward leaned in and gave her a kiss own her cheek, bella leaned into his touch, edward whisper in her ear and told her everything is going to be ok, and she believes him, so much, and she wants it to be true so bad. Bella can’t help but feel like there's a hole in her heart, where Jacob should be. 

This is the worst kind of pain, this must be what jacob is feeling, he doesn't even what he would have done if bella would have chosen jacob instead of him, he surely would have killed jaob if even came down to it, he would do anything to have bella at his side, edward shudders at his dark thoughts it would have not ended well. He knows Bella feels like she’s breaking, she knows he is going to catch her when she falls. 

Edward knew he needed to give the wolf, to get himself together, but I can feel the sadness seeping off of her and he does something, but he thinks it’s wise to leave it alone for a while, and watch everything fall out without his help.

Jacob was trying so hard to avoid the couple in the back of the classroom that’s staring holes in the back of my head, so far he hasn’t even looked back at them at all since the morning time, it doesn't help that everyone keeps telling me that they are staring. Jacob scowled harder, he scowled so hard that everyone who usually talked to him in the morning backed off and left him alone, good just the way he wanted it to be. 

Finally when the teacher started the lesson, everyone stopped their godforsaken staring. So Jacob leaned back in his chair and tried to relax his mind and body. He breathed heavily trying to pay attention in class, but then he remembered that his father gave him permission to leave school early if he couldn't take it anymore. Maybe he should just leave, and get away from them early, the faster he leaves and less he was to look at them. Jacob got up, grabbed his stuffed and left, went past the office, gave the lady the note and lifted. He called Billy to let him know that he left, as he was going to ride around town for a while to clear his head. 

Jacob stopped at a regular auto repair store , he’s a regular here , when he pulled up he saw a motorcycle and two cars he had never seen before ever, he only saw cars like that with the cullens, he growled at the thought. Stupid cullens ruining my life. 

As I go to pay for my things, I am waiting in line as I see a beautiful girl with long brown hair , with brown skin to match and wow she’s beautiful. I have never seen her here before, I wonder where she’s from. She gets her stuff and leaves, she smells nice, like cotton candy. I watch her leave and she gets in the expensive car I saw in the park a lot and drives off. The rest of the cars pull off with her. Huh well that answers that question. 

For the last couple of weeks Jacob has avoided Edward and Bella, he’s quite proud of himself for not dealing with them. He feels way better now that he is Bella and edward. No drama, no vampires trying to kill him, everything is just fine and he likes it that way. Except he’s lonely without Bella, she was his best friend. 

So I decided to go to the arcade. When he gets there , he sees the beautiful girl again. Even though it’s been weeks since Bella told him that they could never be, it feels like he would be betraying her, by talking to another female.so Jacob goes to a game where you can kill vampires. As Jacob kills the vampires he starts feeling a little bit better imagining the cullens are the ones he’s killing. 

“Hey “ someone taps his shoulder.

“What? I am on a roll here if you wanna your gonna have to wait”

“No, I wanted to know if i could play with ya.”

As soon as Jacob dies in the game he turns around to the person with his eyebrows raised and a huff. Jacob was getting ready to fuss , but when he saw that it was the beautiful girl, he kept seeing around town. He couldn't bring himself to fuss at her. 

“ so i we play the game or you not tryna share hm?'' She raised one eyebrow at him. 

“What’s your name , I haven't seen you before ?” 

“ My names Meissa, i moved here a couple of weeks ago, how about you dark n gloomy?”

Dark and gloomy? Did she just say I'm dark and gloomy??

“I- i am not dark n gloomy shorty”

She gasps and looks at him with big eyes, “ I am not short, dark and gloomy.”

We got in a short argument and started going back, both refusing to quit. I had to say that I had fun with her. maybe she’ll stick around. Wait, I barely know her. I can't get my hopes, but just for now, I'll have fun messing with her. And soon enough she gave up. She huffed and puffed out her cheeks. I smirked, I won.

“Heh I guess you're short then.” I bend down to her level just to mess with her more. 

She raises an eyebrow at me, and pushes my face away from hers.” yeah well you're still dark and gloomy.”

“Why i gotta be dark n gloomy ?” I am curious about her answer if I am being honest with myself.

She crosses her arms.`` Well for one , you look really sad and angry. Two, you've been furiously killing vampires like one of them wronged you. And three, you looked like you needed a friend.” she looked away from his face when she said that last part. Maybe she thought he didn’t want to be her friend or something. 

What's crazy is she hit the nail on the head. He is angry, sad and hurt. Angry at himself for thinking that Bella would ever choose him. Angry at Bella for leading him on to the point where he thought he had a chance to be with her. Angry at that leech that stole her away. Sad because he wanted to make a life with her, wanted to show her that he could love her better than he could. Sad because she never loved him the way he loved her. Angry because she used him, and he couldn’t see that. Hurt because every time he thinks about them he can't stand it, it makes his heart hurt, he can’t look at them, and be near them without causing himself pain. Seeing her look at that leech with all the love that he wanted her to look at him with, he can't deal with that. Not right now at least. 

He had been playing that game furiously, he thought maybe he could get his anger out of the game instead of the real thing. Instead of talking to the people that want to help him. Playing that game has helped vent out his frustration on the leech, but not all the way. Maybe they need to talk, but i, would rather kill myself them have a conversation with ethier one right now. Maybe he did need a friend, a fresh face to talk too. 

Jacob looked at Meissa “ So what are you, some type of therapist?”

Messia lip curled a little, she looked amused. Jacob's eyebrow lifted a little higher than he thought it could. This girl is nothing like Bella as far as he could tell. She had brown skin , curly hair that looks like it could puff up at any minute, big brown eyes and full lips. She was wearing a Transformers t-shirt and leggings, something Bella would never wear. Meissa looked a little more playful and mischievous. 

“ no i am not a therapist. I have eye’s and I can see when someone is hurting.” she said softly.

She’s also blunt, nice . 

“ and what if i am hurting? What are you going to do?

The first thing she does catches him off guard, she hugged. Rubbed his back in small circles and told him it’s okay to hurt. Her hugs felt warm and safe. Then she put a hand in his hair and rubbed his scalp, like she could soothe all his problems away. Jacob wouldn’t admit it, but he melted into her arms and stayed there. She was a complete stranger, but she hugged him, she’s comforting him like she knows him, like she cares. She didn’t even ask why I am like this, why I am hurting. This is nice. 

When she let him go, she smiled at him. And he couldn't do anything but smile back at her. She looked at her watch then looked back at him. She looked a little sad but she smiled at him anyways. 

“ hey i have to head out but ill catch you later and maybe next time i can catch that name of your dark n gloomy.” she said as she started to leave.   
“My Name is Jacob” i yelled, she turned back around and gave me one of the brightest smiles i’ve ever seen. 

“ gotcha Jacob, see ya later.” now she was gone. 

Jacob felt better than he had in days. Maybe hugs really do work. Should he just start giving out hugs too?


End file.
